I’ll be the one to break your face.

I dream of him,

I see his face everywhere I go.

I feel his heartbeat once more, and breathe along with him.

And long to dig deeper into his endless blue eyes. The time has passed, the seasons have long changed, and that summer heat has returned. But his love is so far gone, no matter how far I look it is forever gone. His love once was enough. But even if I long for his face once more, or the brush of his cheek, I know he was never the one. His love is not mine. Not then, not now, not ever.

yep. My hair are really REALLY disgusting. 

But it’s in memoriam for the King of Friendzone. Last Tuesday I finished reading Deathly Hallows. It was incredibly painful. No one on this earth, will be ever able of emotion so strong and with such endurance. 

Everypony! Rememer him, pray to him, to never be so friendzoned as him. 

And pray for me, because I am going to lost my love just as him. 

But not here. At home.
I want to go home.

thats the only right word to explain what exactly is (going on) in my head. I don’t belive in love. I don’t belive in forever and ever. And i am not much good in lying. I excuse myself, my toughts, my behavor, with a sentence “I just need to get slapped” but in fact, if I could meet myself a year ago, I would be embarassed.

I listen shits.

Think about shits.

Watch shits.

I have no proper life.

A year ago, if I would break a heart, I would just listen some Sentenced and wouldn’t give a fuck about it anymore. Now, I am  so fucking touchy, that it isn’t even possible. I hate it. I hate everyone, because I am not strong enough, to hate myself. But i Do.

And what am I doing right now?

I am listening some Sentenced and dont give a fuck.

like a boss

Another Night you’re on my mind

I’m hypnotized, but I can’t find the signs

…

Why won’t you call and come home?

Please, call and come home!

watching Starwars again maybe wasn’t such a bad idea :D

when I hear everybody is wishing me their “Merry Christmas”. I don’t care, if they are honest or not, I don’t care if they are just trying to make me feel better, I don’t care.

Because this is the most awful Christmas ever, and if it’s the last one….well thanks god for it. 

Told me, -I killed the God today. 

I don’t care. But I can always pretend, just to be kind. 

Think, if you’d call me right now and said -I love you. I would just say -I don’t care.

Well, merry christmas everybody.

Alone, in the dark, don’t feel a thing is like win the lotery.